Congratulations! Why? Well firstly for getting an important role to that special friend or family member and also even through you’ve probably heard many wedding speeches in your lifetime, you still care enough to do some proper research- look for an ‘edge’, to make your wedding speech unique and memorable too.
It is actually very thoughtful for you to look up some help to make your part the best you can make it. While speaking seems simple enough, it isn’t always easy to for everyone.
And even when it is, it isn’t always entertaining or interesting… These challenges tend to dampen this part of the party, when it should always be light, positive and happy as it is a celebration of love.
Weddings are also often surrounded in so much emotion, excitement and anxiety that these tend to get in the way of even good speakers. The best way to really overcome this is to be prepared.
So let’s get started, and get you prepared.
5 Powerful Elements That Will Captivate Your Audience
When it comes to speaking to an audience it’s more than just WHAT you say that’ll help you hit that spot. It’s HOW you say it and that is key when it comes to memorable wedding speeches. So here are some reminders in that area:
Pace
Be conscious as well of how fast you speak, as your audience may end up missing all the wonderful things you’ve planned to say.
Meanwhile, talking too slow can lull them to sleep. You know how that one goes as I bet you’ve heard a few of those wedding speeches at some point! So try to find a balance between that.
Pauses
Remember to pause every now and then. It gives you a chance to breath, gather your thoughts and allows your audience to keep up to you. It also helps you check.
Pauses are also useful for dramatic effect, like when making your way to a punchline, or when you’ve dropped a drama bomb on the audience.
Volume
You will probably have a mic, so you don’t have to speak out so loud. But take a few seconds before you begin to test it. So you know how far your mouth needs to be there.
Remember too that speaking too loud into the mic can come out garbled or with static through the speaker.
Experts also use volume for some dramatic effect. Like whispering some parts, or shouting some parts out intentionally, or even playing with loud and soft to stress some points.
This ‘light and shade’ technique can really take the delivery of your wedding speech to the next level. It keeps the audience totally engaged as it builds real anticipation to what is coming up next.
Clarity
Now this bit is a given. If you’re eating your words, then no matter how wonderful your message is, it’ll just get lost in there.
One helpful tip is to keep a smile. A smile forces you to open your mouth better allowing you to also enunciate better.
Time Allotment
Ideally you want to keep your wedding speech to within 5 to 7 minutes. Any more than that and you lose the audience interest, or end up taking too much time off the program.
It’s also the best time that allows for people to remember more of what you say.
Letting Your Wedding Speech Flow
So now that we’ve talked about the “How To” basics of speaking, let’s go over the “What To”.
We’re not yet ready to go into content yet but understanding how to move from one thought to the next so you can have a fluid transition from each part to the next.
We look at the format first before you decide what goes in. It’ll help you decide as well how to tie pieces together.
For example, looking at this perspective allows you to decide to choose a story in the opening or something about the bride/groom or being a couple that can be tied to your closing statements.
So here’s a basic format you’ll often find yourself going through when preparing for any form of wedding speeches:
- Greetings and Introduction
- Word of thanks
- A brief history of your relationship to the bride, groom and couple
- Something about the bride (may come before or after the groom, depending on your relationship to the couple and your role)
- Something about the groom
- Closing statements which could include:
- A quote
- Advice
- A story tied to an earlier part of your speech
- Best wishes
- A toast
What To Talk About In Your Speech
As you go through each part, what you find yourself doing to add content for each is to look back on a couple of things and even your surroundings.
This includes going way back memory lane too depending on your relationship with the couple.
There are many things you can talk about so feel free to build a list of these stories and memories and start crossing out from the list until you have your chosen topic to include.
Going through the format also allows you to decide when to inject humor, when to get some involvement or when to throw in a little drama.
Humor is somewhat typical and almost expected when delivering a Best Man Wedding speech, Father of the Bride speech or Father of the Groom speech.
But these days, it’s starting to become even more popular and expected for a Matron of Honor, Maid of Honor or even Bridesmaid speech.
As you start deciding on what to include here are some questions to guide you as you consider what to include your content:
- Will it humiliate any one of the guests?
- Will it embarrass any one of the couple?
- Will cause offense to any of the guests in terms of gender, race, or religion?
- Does it highlight the couple’s relationship?
- Does it highlight the couple as individuals?
- Does it reflect the special relationship you share with either groom or bride?
- Does it emphasize the celebration of the union and of good things to come?
- Is it something you will be proud of saying?
- Is it something the couple will take to heart as they start on this next phase of their life?
There are many things to say, though not all need to be said in this moment. There will be more time for talk and more intimate conversations during and even days after the celebration.
So worry not about missing a few things and think more of what is the most important, valuable and touching to say than having to cover all in one.
And with that, you’re on your way to get that pen, and start writing your wedding speech.
Congratulations again to you for being part of this special occasion, and congratulations to the couple both for their celebration of love and for having someone like you who cares enough to look up advice like this to help make this day special.